Jump to content
Grimm65

Devastating Family Crisis

Recommended Posts

Hey Grimm, that is devastating news. I'm sorry to hear about what your brother is going through? Does he have a wife and/or kids? How are you handling this news?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, Marfe Jokin said:

Hey Grimm, that is devastating news. I'm sorry to hear about what your brother is going through? Does he have a wife and/or kids? How are you handling this news?

My brother got divorced years ago and has never gotten back into any relationship since.  He had been living alone in a different city for 15 years.  His house is on the market now and he is living in our parents  spare room in the flat below me.  So he is not going through this alone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry to hear this Grimm. I'm not much of a prayer guy, but make sure to spend time with Terry. It is always worth making memories just in case. If he's half as ornery as you, he's going to be fine :)   I wish him luck in his battle. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey Grimm, just seeing this now. Good on ya for sharing. No question talking about things like this can help. Unfortunately I am no stranger to cancer among my family members as well. Some advice I got that helped some was to not "future cast"... a natural human tendency to extrapolate scenarios. Try and stay in the moment, help Terry deal with everything as it comes, and try and find ways to help him find enjoyment, or peace, however small. The difficulties are of course immense, but finding ways to be proactive can help, if even around the edges. 

I have been rolling tanks pretty much every night  myself lately... always up for a toon... it can be therapeutic to yell at yolo juggernaut and make fun of his zero damage games... and every now and then he actually has a decent game ?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So I thought I would give an update - It has been a real long hard year for me!

I have been dealing with my brother's cancer as you know from this tread.  I have also had to deal with my daughter telling me that she never wants to see me or talk to me again as she has decided that I broke the family up years ago when her mother left me 9 years ago so I have not been able to talk to her since March this year and have not seen her since last Christmas, which has been heartbreaking. I am hoping that one day she will finally see what really happened for herself and allow me back into her life.

As to my brother (Terry) I have running back and forth to his chemo treatments every week for the last 8 months - this may sound weird but I have come to enjoy this time with him every week.  My work has been fantastic allowing me to work from home every Tuesday to do this running.  I was just informed that he only has to more sessions and then his chemo is done.  He is being placed in palliative starting Dec1. The doctors are only giving him until mid January. When he started this journey a year ago his cancer was in his esophagus, kidney, lymph node, and hip joint.  It has now spread to his brain and his entire stomach.  He has lost over 300 lbs now (yes he was a big man) and he has about 50lbs of loose skin so that can tell you what this has done to him.

The doctors have been continuing his treatments to allow my brother to see one more birthday (mid Dec) and Christmas. 

After my divorce 9 years ago I suffered from suicidal depression and the therapist told me that once depressed always depressed - it is just what you do to deal with it.  I bottle a lot up but I know I shouldn't.  I have a great support system here at home with my current wife an my son but sometimes you need to talk about this with friends and that is what I classify you all.  

Sometimes it is just real hard....

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×